Tucker Carlson isn’t a very bright bulb, as anyone who has ever watched his wingtard talking point recital (disguised as a CNN “news” program) knows all too well. But as surely as a stopped clock can be right twice a day, even a confirmed wingtard moron like Carlson will get one right occasionally.

Carlson was definitely right when he was talking to the demented assemblage at CPAC, but he really should have known better. You don’t get very far preaching temperance at the bar, and you don’t get very far talking reality in the halls of a mental institution.

Carlson learned this in a hurry, as you can see.

Tucker Carlson closed out the first day of the Conservative Political Action Conference on Thursday to a chorus of boos. His crime: informing a crowd of youngish, frustrated conservatives that if they wanted to succeed, they had to copy The New York Times.

“The New York Times is a liberal newspaper,” said Carlson. The catcalls started in. “They go out, and they get the facts.” More boos. “Conservatives need to copy that — they need to get out find out what’s going on, and not just analyze things based on what the mainstream media has reported.”

Carlson finished his speech (”thank you for indulging me”), and the day was gaveled to a close. The image on the giant screens in the Omni Shoreham’s ballroom changed to an ad for PajamasTV, which promised “analysis” of the news — just the thing that Carlson had criticized. In a parody of Apple’s “I’m a Mac, I’m a PC” ads, a staid-looking man in a suit played “mainstream media” to a hip young man’s “PajamasTV.”

“It’s my job to tell you the facts,” said Mainstream Media.

“Yeah, like Dan Rather got it right about President Bush’s service record,” said PajamasTV.

At CPAC, the annual conference of the conservative movement celebrating its 36th year, there is no question who got the better of this exchange. Carlson is wrong, and the makers of PajamasTV — who ran a souped-up media booth, sponsored several tables for bloggers, and attracted hundreds of CPAC spectators to a simultaneous “Conservatism 2.0″ conference — are right. The conservative movement lost ground in 2006 and 2008 because it lost its way and because the Democrats had better messaging. America is still a center-right country, and President Obama’s approval is bound to come back to Earth. There is plenty of reflection on the mistakes Republicans made in power, which CPAC conservatives define as spending too much money, botching the management of Hurricane Katrina relief, and not demanding accountability from their scandalized members. There is plenty of confidence that the new president is going to push Americans back into their arms.

“This is probably too strong,” said Doug Haney, the city attorney in Carmel, Ind., and a Republican precinct committeeman, “but Hitler also gave great speeches.”

Bat-shit crazy, anyone? The wingtards in attendance at CPAC apparently believe that the way to treat a finger you smashed in the car door is to swing the door on your finger again and angain until it gets better. Rational people know, of course, that all you’ll do is cut the finger off, plus you’ll wind up with a lot of bloody upholstery to clean up.

We’re certainly not talking about rational people in this case, though. Right, Tucker?

Tags: cpac, dementia, failure, republicans, tucker carlson

This entry was posted on Sunday, March 1st, 2009 at 8:17 pm and is filed under Jolly Roger, Republican'ts!, Unstable Wingnuts of the Radical Right. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.